`aisya
`anthony
`brenna
`chiasin
`daniel tan
`filly
`freddie
`gloria
`hubert
`huiqing
`ivan
`jieying
`joanne lee
`jowell
`joyce see
`junjie
`kangsheng
`kezia
`kwangwei
`lianhong
`leepeng
`marcus
`maureen
`pamela
`reeve
`ruikun
`sharon
`sherlyn
`thena
`wee cheong
`weimin
`xinyi
`xinyue
`yichang
`anthony
`brenna
`chiasin
`daniel tan
`filly
`freddie
`gloria
`hubert
`huiqing
`ivan
`jieying
`joanne lee
`jowell
`joyce see
`junjie
`kangsheng
`kezia
`kwangwei
`lianhong
`leepeng
`marcus
`maureen
`pamela
`reeve
`ruikun
`sharon
`sherlyn
`thena
`wee cheong
`weimin
`xinyi
`xinyue
`yichang
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
Sigh. I just feel like sighing! =X
I know I shan't be feeling this at this point of time. But, I just can't help feeling so mad when people like him keep changing topics while smsing?! plus replying so slow?! Even though we've made a deal to blog instead of sms as much, I just can't help it. I know that it is not for me to be so angry especially at this point of time when I'm already a nobody to him, yet I feel helpless for being so demanding. & Whether or not am I being a selfish petty old woman who was thinking(making assumptions I supposed) that he's surely doing his own stuff and then CHOOSE TO put everything else aside.. ..I think I don't really care at this particular moment already? Well, I guess I'm really thinking so far? that if this continues, he'll probably be doing this next time as well? Habits are hard to kick. All these while, I realised I've been changing him; for better?? I hope so.. cuz' he once told me that he chose to compromise in the very first place as he thought that he ought to change. Well, Ain't I thinking too far?? Indeed I am..and I guess I shan't because things are no longer the same. *sniff* Can I just forget about all these hanky panky stuffs and carry on with my OWN life? & to accept that..he still has other important things other than just me in his life.. >.<
Seriously, where's my faith? I think it's probably down the drain. Seeing so many examples infront of me, I really can't help seeing such "ending" in us too. How much assurance can you give? when I see things such as "promises are meant to be broken" "it's all predestined" "things are unpredictable" and etc..well, anything can happen isn't it? You can affirm me right now, but still there's still a possibility whereby anything can happen isn't it? Even me myself am not confident of myself, how much more do you expect out of me to you? And, I fear God, I really do. Even though I know that he has the greatest plan for us, somehow I just fear that it ain't the way I can ever accept. All I can do is to wait aimlessly; not knowing when ever will I wait until? and also pray? ...is that all? what else can I do?
Seems like..I can't see any brightness infront of us.. I only see a hollow hole with that only glim of light; so weak and faltering. It's just this feeble light supporting everything. Waiting ain't guranteeing anything. It's just an unguaranteed warranty. Waiting is the grip between our love; sad to say perseverance ain't gonna buy a winning battle. It just shows the love we once had; not determining the future we hold.
Impish princess signed off`
I know I shan't be feeling this at this point of time. But, I just can't help feeling so mad when people like him keep changing topics while smsing?! plus replying so slow?! Even though we've made a deal to blog instead of sms as much, I just can't help it. I know that it is not for me to be so angry especially at this point of time when I'm already a nobody to him, yet I feel helpless for being so demanding. & Whether or not am I being a selfish petty old woman who was thinking(making assumptions I supposed) that he's surely doing his own stuff and then CHOOSE TO put everything else aside.. ..I think I don't really care at this particular moment already? Well, I guess I'm really thinking so far? that if this continues, he'll probably be doing this next time as well? Habits are hard to kick. All these while, I realised I've been changing him; for better?? I hope so.. cuz' he once told me that he chose to compromise in the very first place as he thought that he ought to change. Well, Ain't I thinking too far?? Indeed I am..and I guess I shan't because things are no longer the same. *sniff* Can I just forget about all these hanky panky stuffs and carry on with my OWN life? & to accept that..he still has other important things other than just me in his life.. >.<
Seriously, where's my faith? I think it's probably down the drain. Seeing so many examples infront of me, I really can't help seeing such "ending" in us too. How much assurance can you give? when I see things such as "promises are meant to be broken" "it's all predestined" "things are unpredictable" and etc..well, anything can happen isn't it? You can affirm me right now, but still there's still a possibility whereby anything can happen isn't it? Even me myself am not confident of myself, how much more do you expect out of me to you? And, I fear God, I really do. Even though I know that he has the greatest plan for us, somehow I just fear that it ain't the way I can ever accept. All I can do is to wait aimlessly; not knowing when ever will I wait until? and also pray? ...is that all? what else can I do?
Seems like..I can't see any brightness infront of us.. I only see a hollow hole with that only glim of light; so weak and faltering. It's just this feeble light supporting everything. Waiting ain't guranteeing anything. It's just an unguaranteed warranty. Waiting is the grip between our love; sad to say perseverance ain't gonna buy a winning battle. It just shows the love we once had; not determining the future we hold.
Impish princess signed off`