Peek-a-Boo.

Friday, October 14, 2005

sians ~ I went gyming today and then I forgot to bring my towel. Hmm... kind of *malu* bahs?! hahs. Cuz' the instructor asked me "where's your towel? place it here.." How can I be so forgetful? The gym centre makes sure people have a towel with them everytime.. Anyway, it's over larhs. After gyming, I actually found out that I ain't as strong as before. What I meant ain't physically.. I guess it's mentally? Cuz' jogging/running has always been something I considered "mental power" - determination; not "how strong your body is". Since secondary school, I'll always lead the class(the top fews) who can really run without stopping and finish the run within a timing. My secret recipe is "determination"; don't ever give up. I don't even allow myself to stop for once to rest or whatsoever. Now that I haven't complete my 2.4km run in the gym, I prompted myself why? I sort of realised that I've become "weaker" in a sense. I'm more feeble in my heart & soul. I am no longer the Jose who will never succumb to failure in many areas of my life. Right now, I am just this weak. How I wish I can regain the amount of determination I used to have... I guess it takes time. When I'm back on track; forgetting every past hurts then I'll be able to do so? Well, I'm kind of bliss to have Sotong with me right? even though there're rough patches everywhere... I'm sure Sotong will make my path nice and smooth again? I guess he won't do things to hurt me again? ...&...I guess I need to have confidence in him? =) Well, it all takes time..

Sigh. I miss Sotong. It's complicated between him & me. He left Singapore with a happy and sweet ending for the both of us. But, it's actually quite a mystery in a sense? I don't know whether we'll continue life as such? Of course I really wish..well..this can only be answered when he's back? As I was watching the show just now, I suddenly craved for him. I just want him to be with me for that moment... maybe..all I've wanted ain't just short moments. I'm greedy for more? Well, I know we ought to be contented with what we have. It's just a feeling striking past me just now. I wish he'll be back soon!! 5 more days to go.. And even if he's back, I wonder when will I get to see him? Thursday should be out? I want him to rest well? If possible, I will want friday because weekends seems to be out for the both of us? & I'm going for a chalet on Sunday until Monday. This means I can only probably meet him on Tuesday earliest? Well, we shall see how again larhs.. =X I miss Sotong really really much.. guess he's asleep already at this hour? Hymph` Alright, ending off...

Dear, around 5 more days.. Miss you lots~ =/

Impish Princess signed off`