`aisya
`anthony
`brenna
`chiasin
`daniel tan
`filly
`freddie
`gloria
`hubert
`huiqing
`ivan
`jieying
`joanne lee
`jowell
`joyce see
`junjie
`kangsheng
`kezia
`kwangwei
`lianhong
`leepeng
`marcus
`maureen
`pamela
`reeve
`ruikun
`sharon
`sherlyn
`thena
`wee cheong
`weimin
`xinyi
`xinyue
`yichang
`anthony
`brenna
`chiasin
`daniel tan
`filly
`freddie
`gloria
`hubert
`huiqing
`ivan
`jieying
`joanne lee
`jowell
`joyce see
`junjie
`kangsheng
`kezia
`kwangwei
`lianhong
`leepeng
`marcus
`maureen
`pamela
`reeve
`ruikun
`sharon
`sherlyn
`thena
`wee cheong
`weimin
`xinyi
`xinyue
`yichang
Monday, September 11, 2006
hmm.. today is another day. cuz' of cashflow problem, i decided to stay at home instead. "another" -- i find time passes really slow manx. sighs. wonder how my past 1 month flies so fast, and yet it's so slow right now.
practically, sotong called everyday. i mean so far 3 times ever since saturday. yesterday, sotong's mum called me to talk..asked me if sotong did call me for the very first day cuz' they did not receive a call but only sms. i said yes, it must be rather heartbreaking for them, i felt. so, i messaged sotong that he should call cuz' his mum misses him alot. afterwhich, he called me and he told me that he already call them. hmm.. i seem to be so much closer to his family after his NS started. i mean.. this NS thingy really did break the ice between me and them. even sotong was very shocked to know that his mum called me. oh well, yar.. so he did call me everyday so far, but it was really really short, like less than 5 minutes? i felt very disturbed by it only today.. cuz' i suddenly have a thought that struck past my mind just now. "he don't even know my life and stuff..communication breakdown" i guess it's alil bit too serious to use "communication breakdown" but it's just a passing thought. also after that, it came to my mind of those stories i heard.. girls leaving NS guy cuz' they don't feel secure and love. suddenly, today i felt so much cuz' of his short call. i know that he is trying to assure me if i'm not wrong..he said "tomorrow i will try to call you earlier cuz' should be these few days will be more busy only". but he said that for the past 2 days already? hymph. i don't know. i know that i should be cheering him on and really gotta be positive so that he won't feel lousy in there, but i just feel rather down deep in my heart. i mean.. i guess he wouldn't know that somebody is wooing me right now? and he's a great romantic guy. what a temptation satan has set across for me. i'm really worried that i may be the girl leaving him someday.. i really do not wish this to happen cuz' i know he'll be terribly upset. perhaps i'm having low faith right now. but what can i do? i do not know how to shake that guy away..cuz' afterall we do know each other quite abit. sighs. i really hope.. this 1 and half year really passes quickly.
another thought that came past my mind right now is.. on the 22nd when he can finally book out from tekong for the very first time, i "should be" able to fetch him if there ain't any last minute thingy. however, if i don't remember wrongly, 23rd and 24th is the audition for "the dance floor". this means that i have to commit from day to night for that 2 days. i do not know how to arrange the time to spend time together.. cuz' he'll be too tired to meet me on saturday night(cuz sunday got morning church) while on sunday night, he has to book in already. and i don't even know if i'll end earlier than the time he needs to book in. so, the only possibility is friday right after he books out. however, on the other hand, i'm also thinking for his parents. i mean..when their son finally books out, they'll surely wanna have a good dinner with him or something. so, well.. i don't know la. we'll see how. let nature takes it flow. even if we're unable to meet for that week, it's okay to wait for another week, making it 3 weeks in a row..right? i think this is the time.. he needs to has leadership and makes wise decision for the benefit of all. but my boy hasn't seem to grow up till so sensible yet?.. i think.
another long entry forgodden sake. oh well.. i guess many things are happening around my life now la.. it's really another phase of life for him and for me. we've to adapt and get through it. life goes on, isn't it? hymph.. alright ending off.
arghhhhh....
sign off`
practically, sotong called everyday. i mean so far 3 times ever since saturday. yesterday, sotong's mum called me to talk..asked me if sotong did call me for the very first day cuz' they did not receive a call but only sms. i said yes, it must be rather heartbreaking for them, i felt. so, i messaged sotong that he should call cuz' his mum misses him alot. afterwhich, he called me and he told me that he already call them. hmm.. i seem to be so much closer to his family after his NS started. i mean.. this NS thingy really did break the ice between me and them. even sotong was very shocked to know that his mum called me. oh well, yar.. so he did call me everyday so far, but it was really really short, like less than 5 minutes? i felt very disturbed by it only today.. cuz' i suddenly have a thought that struck past my mind just now. "he don't even know my life and stuff..communication breakdown" i guess it's alil bit too serious to use "communication breakdown" but it's just a passing thought. also after that, it came to my mind of those stories i heard.. girls leaving NS guy cuz' they don't feel secure and love. suddenly, today i felt so much cuz' of his short call. i know that he is trying to assure me if i'm not wrong..he said "tomorrow i will try to call you earlier cuz' should be these few days will be more busy only". but he said that for the past 2 days already? hymph. i don't know. i know that i should be cheering him on and really gotta be positive so that he won't feel lousy in there, but i just feel rather down deep in my heart. i mean.. i guess he wouldn't know that somebody is wooing me right now? and he's a great romantic guy. what a temptation satan has set across for me. i'm really worried that i may be the girl leaving him someday.. i really do not wish this to happen cuz' i know he'll be terribly upset. perhaps i'm having low faith right now. but what can i do? i do not know how to shake that guy away..cuz' afterall we do know each other quite abit. sighs. i really hope.. this 1 and half year really passes quickly.
another thought that came past my mind right now is.. on the 22nd when he can finally book out from tekong for the very first time, i "should be" able to fetch him if there ain't any last minute thingy. however, if i don't remember wrongly, 23rd and 24th is the audition for "the dance floor". this means that i have to commit from day to night for that 2 days. i do not know how to arrange the time to spend time together.. cuz' he'll be too tired to meet me on saturday night(cuz sunday got morning church) while on sunday night, he has to book in already. and i don't even know if i'll end earlier than the time he needs to book in. so, the only possibility is friday right after he books out. however, on the other hand, i'm also thinking for his parents. i mean..when their son finally books out, they'll surely wanna have a good dinner with him or something. so, well.. i don't know la. we'll see how. let nature takes it flow. even if we're unable to meet for that week, it's okay to wait for another week, making it 3 weeks in a row..right? i think this is the time.. he needs to has leadership and makes wise decision for the benefit of all. but my boy hasn't seem to grow up till so sensible yet?.. i think.
another long entry forgodden sake. oh well.. i guess many things are happening around my life now la.. it's really another phase of life for him and for me. we've to adapt and get through it. life goes on, isn't it? hymph.. alright ending off.
arghhhhh....
sign off`